Waste-your-waqt watching this Ishq (Movie Review: Kambakkht Ishq)

With a media reported budget of Rs. 90 Crores and a stellar cast of "Hit" Akshay Kumar and "Hardly had any hit" Kareena Kapoor, any idiot would have made a gem of the movie. But this idiot director makes a big mess of the movie. Allegedly, its inspired from Kamal Hassan's Tamil flick "Pammal K. Sambandam", although I have not seen the movie (so cannot comment on the same). Producer Sajid Nadiadwala's previous flick "Heyy Baby" was at least fun to watch once but this movie irritates you to the core. I came out of the auditorium only banging my head.

Instead of writing a regular review, I will give you six reasons for not watching this movie. Here you go....

1. Akshay Kumar's repetitive performance. Although, he is the only one who makes you laugh (occasionally) and is the only saving grace of the film (Hey Readers, please forgive me if this motivates you to watch the movie!!!). But at the end of the movie you feel that you have seen and heard it earlier.
2. Kareena Kapoor has 1000 expressions on her face at one time. Do you call it acting? At least, I don't. Although she looks good in the designer dresses.
3. Storyline - OMG!!! Simrita (Kareena), a model (Sorry!!! Supermodel) plus a surgeon and a female chauvinist , accidentally drops her alarm watch (which alarm? "Om Mangalam Bhagwaan"!!!) in Viraj's (Akshay Kumar) body (Viraj is a Hollywood Stuntman) while operating on him (Both the characters hate each other for almost 90% of the movie). The only repercussion is the alarm rings after every hour and even in an Oscar like event. Fearing her career would go for a toss, Simrita woos Viraj and in the end both of them fall in love with each other (I don't even feel like hiding the storyline).
4. The side characters - Javed Jaffery- was he funny or was he even related to the film's story? Aftaab Shivdasani - As usual looks helpless, Amrita Arora - gets farted on her face (in the movie, kiddos)!!!! Deserves a similar treatment for her acting, Kehkashan Patel - should never act, Kirron Kher - what a fantastic actor but what rubbish acting, Boman Irani - Cameos bring a refreshing change in a movie's storyline. But this man's cameo irritates you. Vindu Dara Singh - Papa Dara Singh, use your power, throw your son in a closet and never let him act.
5. Music - It has got two-three numbers which makes you dance but onscreen, they are wasted with 'apparently looks like already seen' locales and unattractive sets.
6. Last but not the least, the much hyped Hollywood starcast 1. Sylvester Stallone - He appears twice in the second half of the movie. Once in the Oscar like event, where our hero touches his feet for being the guru of action to seek his blessings (The scene was created only to impress Stallone; had no relation to the movie's story). Secondly, he appears in the climax scene where he walks alone on the streets of LA, fights with the goons saving our heroine and finally gets a kiss on the cheek by her, all this without a glimpse of Papparazzi. Come on media guys, where are you? The only good part was his punches remindedme of his "Rocky" days 2. Denise Richards - Surprisingly, she is the second leading lady of the film. She was never an actor in Hollywood and the same goes with Bollywood. 3. Brandon Routh - Just a 30 secs scene!!! That's it.

The only thing that has worked for the movie is its grand opening it has got worldwide. I will not be surprised if its a superhit. But please don't waste your waqt watching this Ishq!!!!!

Rating - 0.5/5 (Only for a few one liners from Akshay Kumar)